I don’t know about you but as for me, following recent events that transpired over the past few weeks after the tragic, yet avoidable death of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, and George Floyd, things will never be the same again. Prior to all of this kicking off, I remember having a very vivid dream that denoted change was underway. One like we had never quite experienced before. It spoke to me so much so I had a strong feeling to go deeper than I normally would and seek answers to questions I often subconsciously dismissed. But now more so than ever, it has become imperative to face these difficult questions as uncomfortable as it may be, because that’s the only way to dismantle the fabric of the system and bring about real change.
If you’ve been paying close attention to my blog then you’d know since I started it, it’s always been about finding a deeper meaning to life. My journey of self discovery has been very well documented especially focusing on the need for solitude to better gain an understanding of myself. It’s no wonder after I awoke from my dream I felt like my journey had only just begun. Clearly, there was more to be discovered within. And so, I put out a caption on Instagram that read “2020 WILL BE A GREAT YEAR. It is definitely a year of self discovery. I’ve written it down because there’s power in doing so. I can see it already. So many better days lie ahead.”
Luckily for me, from a very early age, I found out my “why” and held on to it. That’s what has kept me going strong despite my challenges which echos a sense of familiarity to folks like myself, as they confirmed, having watched me detail some of them in my recent IGTV video.
If there’s one thing I can take away from all these trying times, it would be that my struggles where there to mould me into the person I need to be in order to fulfil my purpose. As Les Brown aptly put it; “think of it as a character building exercise.” And that I did.
More so than ever before, I find myself willing to learn. Willing to understand how my actions, no matter how little, contribute to the fabric of society. Saying, I can do nothing is no longer an option especially if I don’t try. As Toni Morrison puts it, “correct what you can; learn from what you can’t.” And learning, I am.
As the days go by, it’s very clear to see that nothing will ever be the same again, at least for me. Aligning my actions to my “why” has become to most important task on my everyday to do list. I am determined to walk in my purpose, despite my struggles and that of the world that surrounds me. It is the very least I can do to show my gratitude for the gift of life many haven’t been able to partake in through no fault of theirs. And so for me, the journey of self discovery continues because there’s still much to be done and undone.
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